Episode 109. I Meet Someone with the EXACT Same Name as Me!

In this heartwarming episode, we meet Alicja Matusiak, a young and passionate actress from Poland, who shares her life story. Discover how a chance Facebook search connected two Alicja Matusiaks from different corners of the world. Listen as they discuss the complexities of name twins, the nature of their professions, the benefits and challenges of volunteering, and the cultural differences between living in Poland, Norway, and potentially the United States. Alicja opens up about her experiences in acting school, her aspirations, and the importance of following one's passion despite the uncertainties. This engaging conversation also touches on mental health, the unpredictability of life, and the essence of staying true to one's dreams. Tune in for an inspiring episode that reinforces the power of connection, passion, and perseverance.

CHAPTERS

00:00 Intro

01:15 Connecting with Alicja Matuszak

02:00 Initial Conversations and Misunderstandings

04:56 Life in Poland and Norway

06:52 Pursuing Acting in Poland

07:16 Challenges and Realities of Acting

10:59 Future Plans and Reflections

32:44 Career Aspirations and Family Influence

32:58 Perceptions of America from Poland

35:44 Volunteering Experiences Abroad

37:27 Challenges and Reflections on Volunteering

43:30 Personal Journey into Therapy

50:33 Mental Health Stigma and Family Impact

53:07 Future Aspirations and Relationships

01:00:09 Naked Truths and Final Thoughts

My name is Alicja Matusiak. I grew up in Poland and I came to America and I became Alicja Matusiak. And I was talking to one of my friends the other day and he's a chiropractor and he said that his wife has a name twin in like two or three other states. And he said that frequently her prescriptions that she's supposed to get by mistake, go to like Oklahoma and Kansas.

And then the doctors call his wife and say, Hey, we have a prescription for you. And they say her name. And then it's like, Somehow, it all gets mixed up, and like, it goes to the wrong people with the same name. And so, his wife ended up talking to one of her twin names people, and I heard the story, and I was just cracking up, and I was like, Oh my God, this would be so funny if I met my, uh, my, uh, twin, my, you know, someone with the same name, and we could, like, interview her for our podcast.

And I went home and I started like Facebook searching for, for the Alicja Matuszek, you know, and there was a whole list that came up. I was like, wow, I didn't know my name is so common, you know. And so, uh, so then you were one of the first ones. that I saw and I was like, oh, she seems really cool. She's like going places, volunteering, you know, so I, I messaged you and you kindly, graciously responded and then it took us months still to like talk to each other.

Exactly. I think

three or four even.

Yes, yes, but you know, I figured if you're like me, then you're a busybody and you're always doing something and you never have time. So When we had to cancel the last time I Sophie was asking me. Well, what do you know about this Alicia Matushak? Is she like how old is she like what's going on?

I was like I don't know anything about her. I didn't think about it. I was like, what if she's a minor? And she's like 16 years old. And, you know, and you look so young as I'm looking at you, you do look like you're 16 or 17, honestly.

Well, I will not show you my ID, but I promise I'm not 16.

So for the listeners, uh, we're having a blast and I'm looking at a very beautiful Alicja Matuszak from Poland, and I'm so happy to be talking to you.

And we want to hear about, like, what is it that you do? And are you going to school? Are you working? Like, I just want to learn everything about you. It's just mostly for me, not for the listeners.

Sure. It's just about the message. When I got the message from you, I first thought it's a virus or some fake thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just sponsored it. And my friend, I was reading it to my friend, and my friend was like, No, it seems kind of real. Just text her back. And I was like, Okay, do you really think so? And then it, it worked out like that. But at first, I thought like, What is going on with Facebook? I know. That's weird.

There's so much spam out there. And you get, you know, like friend requests from people that don't exist. And so I, when I messaged you, I was like, Oh gosh, I hope she's not going to think that I'm like some kind of a, you know, spam or like some kind of a person that's trying to like take advantage of her or something.

What account did you message her on?

Uh,

Jane Smith. And I think I, I know. You should have used the Naked Truth Therapy Podcast, then she could find the episode.

I should have done it differently. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So, uh, and then I sent you like a really long email about like what we do. And you were like, at that point, you're like, man, she's serious.

She's like crazy, but she's serious. Yeah.

Yes. Yes. I checked the podcast thing. I checked everything just to make sure that okay. Yeah.

Yeah. But by the end of this podcast, we will ask you to send us a large amount of money and deposit it in our account, okay? No.

But that's And you'll ask about the same thing, so it would be Oh, perfect! It's going to cancel each other. Okay, tell us what you do, what you're studying, and tell us everything.

Just about the, the twin name? Yes. I have in my family, my mom is name is AG Agnes. Aw. And she's the same surly as, as mine. And we had an aunt, which like a woman who, um, who was married to brother of my, um, father.

Okay. So she got the surname mat also. So now we have both ag, like two of them in our family. Wow. And you're Alicja

Matuszak. Yes. Okay. What city in Poland are you in?

Now in Krakow, but most of the time and most of my life I lived in Warsaw, or near the Warsaw Marquis actually. There I spent lots of time. I was living for three years in Norway, in Nur Fuhreit.

Very cool.

I guess.

Were you an au pair or were you a nanny or like what did you do?

My whole family moved there. So we were living there for a time, for some time, and then I moved back, but my family stayed there and then we were like moving across the country.

Mm.

For a while. Why Norway? Um, I dunno. We were on a vacation one time.

Mm-Hmm. . And my father, my, my parents actually decided that it's kind of cool country to live in and to, to, for the children. Sure. For the perspectives, so, and they just decided they will try

it. That's awesome. Did you guys get Norwegian citizenship, too, and do you speak Norwegian? Yes. Wow! Look at, look at that.

That's so cool. How do you say hello in Norwegian, or like, hello, how are you? Hi, guten morgen. I

cannot

say that, but it's, it's fun. I'm calling Joel. Uh huh. That's so perfect. So, your family now is in Warsaw, or they are in Norway?

They split up. I'm in Krakow, part of my family is in Warsaw, my mom is in Norway, my sister is in

Denmark, so Wow, very international family.

So when are you moving to the States, Alicja? Because, you know, like When you invite me, I'm going I'm inviting you already, so, um I'm coming tomorrow. Yay! We need, we need more people here that are really cool. Right. Me and Sophie for the whole world now, like, we need more cool people. So we're gonna invite you.

You're up. I'm in. So what do you study in

Krakow? I'm studying acting, so I'm from the National Theatre Academy. Fancy. Very fancy. And I'm on a third year, so I'm, I'm on a finish right now. And I'm looking for a job. And it's not that easy in current situation. So that's most, that takes the most of the time for me now.

Wow. Well, so what does a life of an actor in Poland, an actor that's studying, uh, what does life of an actor that is studying in Poland look like? What do you do most days?

Yeah, I think it's very important to divide those two, like studying actors and actors that have finished. Um, because the studying time is very, very important and very, it's, it brings a lot of quality and values.

And it's very important, but after that, you don't get a guarantee, guarantee? Guarantee, mm hmm. Sure. For, uh, for, um, for a job, for, yeah, it's just, it's very complicated because you, um, you have no guarantee that someone will hire you. So we just have to wait until someone finds you and think, Oh, she's cool.

Let's try this. We already

think that. So we will have a job for you here. I got the job. Yes, you got the job. I don't know what kind of, what kind of acting could we hire her for? Okay. I don't know yet. Making TikToks TikToks for us. There you go. Great. This is perfect. This is perfect. Uh, you know.

Fine. I found it.

Yeah. So the way I did it was I, I came as an au pair. So, uh, I came in to the States as a nanny, uh, I was 19. And then I was babysitting for someone and they were paying me and I lived with them. And then two years later, I was married, found my husband at that time. And then I was married for about 10 years and then I got divorced.

And, um, and life still keeps going, you know, it's like, you think that you matter only when you have a husband, you know, but then you learn that. Life keeps going whether you have one or not, so you kind of have to figure this shit out, so.

And now you're a badass. And now I'm

a badass, I'm just, I don't need a man apparently.

I do need one, but I don't need them, so it's kind of a, it's, yeah, it's like dessert, yeah. So you're in the U. S. since 19 years old? 1999. So, yeah, a long time. So it wasn't just for

a year, the au pair thing?

Well, the au pair thing was for a year, but then I renewed my contract with the family individually.

And then when I got married, then of course I was married, and then I worked different, for different people. If you want to come to America, you could still sign up for the Au Pair Care Program and just come and babysit for a year and be a nanny and maybe sign up for some different, um, you know, acting things.

Come to Columbus. We'll hang out. She's gotta be in, like, L. A. or something. She's gotta be in L. A., true. Columbus is not that cool. Not for acting. Not for

acting.

Well, but for the own player, it's, it's great. Yes. Yes. Yes. So, so what, okay. So you went into acting, was this something that you always wanted to do?

Or is this just kind of like spur of the moment kind of, yeah.

Well, when I was a kid, I was playing in theater, like professional theater, but I was a kid. So it was, different thing. Uh, but then I forgot about it. I was in music school, whole my childhood. So I'm playing violin and like the music and like the artistic things were always there in my life.

And my whole family is musicians. So they, they play. Mine too. You guys have

so much in common because Sophie sings and she records music. Like you guys should create a band. Yeah, we'll connect. Yeah. Yeah. And

that's how we're gonna live.

Yes. Yes. Okay. So, okay. We have your life figured out for you. I'm already picturing you're coming in as a nanny and then you're signing up with Ohio State University and you're gonna get a degree with music or something and then you're gonna teach and you're gonna create TikToks for us.

Or she's going to go to L. A. and be in a big movie. Nah. Nah. L. A. is overrated.

Or come to SoFi and make a band with SoFi. Yes,

yes, yes. And we'll perform at your coffee shop. Woohoo. Yay. I like it. Sorry I interrupted, but your family was all musicians.

Yeah, so that was part of my life from the beginning, actually.

And then I forget about the theater. Sorry. thing. And, I didn't think I was good enough to do it. So I just quit. And a year before, , going to the university or to the academy, uh, I just went on a workshop with one of the actresses in Poland. Uh, and she just brought back the passion and the, the fire into this.

Yeah.

So you're meant to do it. You're meant to do it, right?

I would like to think about it that way, yes. And so I got to the, to the school, um, or to the academy at the first time, which was kind of success because people often try to do it through the years. Um, it's really funny because we have on the same level, on the same year, we have, um, for example, me, who is the youngest, who's 22 and we have a, a friend who is 29 right now.

So the, the year, the years are just crazy. Yeah. And I started to do the acting and we'll see how this one will go. Wow. I love her.

When you act, is it all in Polish or do you guys do different plays for, you know, other places? It's usually

Polish. Um, last, uh, last year we had the next, um, um, in English, but it was just once.

So, so Polish is, is, is the main language. That's the big

thing. Now, what about like, if someone like, let's say they live here and they speak Polish or they want to learn Polish, if they would want to see some place that you, you are in, is that on YouTube or does your school have like a YouTube channel or somewhere where you guys promote your acting?

No,

uh,

we

have agencies. Yeah, I know. I know. We have a Facebook site where the, where are the pictures of some of the events that take place in our school. Uh, but there's only pictures. There's no like movies or anything like that. Um, yeah, but we're an agency. So if you've got a job, if you've got a project, then you You can get into this and you can be visible in the internet.

Otherwise, no. Do you have your own social media where you promote your acting or do little things to promote yourself? I don't do that. What? Yeah,

yeah, there are different Um, generally, I wouldn't think about this, about this, um, conversation thing. Like, three years ago, I would Totally not do that. So it's kind of a guiding out of my comfort zone.

So that's the part of, of this non, uh, PR thing in my, um, in my career. So I don't do that, I don't do like promotion of, of the things I did, but I know that a lot of people from my year or from the years, um, underneath, they, they do promote their work. And they do have the sites where they show their portfolio or the projects.

So people do that. I just don't.

So she's like me. She's basically has this light within her, but she just shelters the light and just kind of like tries to stay to herself and be modest.

Yeah. But then you have me here and then I promote you. You need, you

need a Sophie, you need, you need a

Sophie, a social

media manager,

Yeah. Yeah. I think that's exactly it, because I don't know, I don't even know how to do that. I mean, there must be a person who knows how to do it. 'cause I just act and people just walk the walk, not talk the talk. . Mm-Hmm. . But it's

also hard because I feel like a lot of, um, like the arts, like acting and music and stuff, it does kind of get.

I don't know how else to say it, but like, kind of dumbed down when you have to put it into these little clips and then, you know, it kind of like cheapens it a little bit because really when you're acting, it's a, it's a whole play. It's a whole movie or when you have a full song, it's like people have five minute songs, you know, but now it has to be one minute, 30 seconds for tick tock and stuff.

And it's hard, but it also is kind of like the game that you have to play. As an artist. So

also we do a lot of theater. So we do like theater things that are not recorded. So we deal with that and we don't have much tears for the portfolio because then you do the movies, but we do the theater. So it's kind of difficult.

So do you do acting every day? Like, is there like different classes that you attend? It's like school taking up most of your day or do you also work? Um, no, most of, most

of the day it's cool. Um, we do even have the, the courses on when, on weekends. So we have like, not every weekend, but most of the time.

And then if you get a job, if you get a project, then you, you have to involve more time into this. So it's, it's kind of, it's, it takes a lot of time to do that.

Can you apply for jobs like online with virtual, uh, acting projects? What's the word? Self tape, I think. Yeah. Self tape.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we do a lot of self tapes, so, but you have to be an agency to get a self tape.

And then you, if you're, if you are in the agency, it's already good, but you won't always get the self tape anyway. So it's kind of a lottery if you will get,

or if you will not. I'm just thinking that it's better to go to a place where maybe there's still theater, there's still things you're going to enjoy doing, but maybe you don't, you don't like Try to set yourself up for like, Oh, I'm going to be, you know, in the 1 percent of the most famous actors.

Like there's actors that work every day and make comfortable living, but you never heard of them, you know? And I'm not saying that you should set yourself up for like, Oh, I don't want to be known, but it's just like, you got to make a living too. So we, you know, Margo, We interviewed Margo, she's one of our therapists, and she went to theater school, and she tried to live that lifestyle, and she said herself, she got tired of being poor.

And she said to herself, how can I use the acting that I love so much, and then also get some kind of a profession with it that merges the two so I can still make money and still do what I love. And she's a therapist. A therapist! Because it's a lot of acting. No, I'm just kidding.

That's crazy, because I'm thinking the same way.

You're such a

good listener that this is what you probably need to think about. And we know an agency that could hire you in Columbus, Ohio. And your boss's name would be Alicja Matuszek.

Great! I found my path. Yay! All it took was Facebook to connect us. Yeah, but that's true. I mean, it's also difficult to choose if you want to be a celebrity and if you want to do the big things or if you want to just stay in, in the field and try to do your things in your little small world.

My sisters used to do acting in Vancouver, which is a, I think a lot of movies are filmed there and TV shows. They did, uh, Uh, what do you call it when you're not a main person, but you have like small roles?

No, like. An extra? An extra. Yes. I feel like I'm an extra in a lot of people's lives. I'm dispensable, so I know that word pretty well.

Yeah. Wait, I'm indispensable. That's a better affirmation.

They did a lot of extra work and they had an agency and they got paid and everything and they would just tell them like come for this movie and they're like in the background of a few shows and stuff, which is cool. Yeah, Yeah,

but that's such shitty work and

you do all this here to medicate James?

She's, she's like, she's like me. She's like, yeah, but that's such shitty work, you know? I love the honesty. No, tell us more. Why is it shitty work? What do you mean?

No, I mean, you get the education, so you really engage in all that. You spend three years of your life getting rid of your private life because you don't have time for that.

You lose all the relationships, you lose other hobbies, you lose even yourself in that. And then you don't get a guarantee for anything, not work, not contacts, not, no, you just nothing. Yeah. When do you graduate? When do you graduate? Uh, I will do my, um, my finished work in, in like half a year. We don't know yet,

but that will be there.

Do you, do you have to do like a, not a dissertation maybe, but some kind of, um, project at the end or something?

Yes, yes. We do in, in our groups, we do the, um, kind of a theater piece. Okay, where we present ourselves and we work on that through two or three months and then we just play it and see how this one goes and then sometimes Sometimes someone will see you like the director of a theater and they will invite you to work with them and sometimes no And then you just deal with it and find a plan B for a living.

Mm hmm. You had a question? No I was gonna say I relate to kind of the feeling of you know You spent all this time in school and then you cuz I wanted to go to music school and stuff but then I First I was studying software engineering and because I have multiple passions like I was like I'm gonna make video games and stuff and then I and then I switched to psychology and but then but throughout that whole time in college, I was working on music, posting music, writing and studying because now you can learn so much just online and now I'm actually in school for audio right now through a virtual program.

But, um, but I feel very like prepared because. While I was in school, I was also studying on my own, you know, so yeah, there's, there's so many ways to do things and you don't have to, I feel like there's this pressure like, oh, you need to go to LA and just like be broke on the street and you know, and it's like, no, you can actually like, it's hard to be creative when your basic needs aren't taken care of.

Exactly. And it's hard to like it when you know that it's not depending on you, actually, so you can't decide, actually, you're just waiting for someone else to decide for what will happen with you.

Mm hmm. And there's the internet now, you don't have to be Anywhere specific, because people go viral in the middle of like, I don't know, Idaho or something, you know, which is like, I don't know, where's Idaho in the middle of the United States somewhere, wherever they make potatoes.

Yeah, there's just potato farms. No, but um, yeah, like the middle of nowhere, you know, you can be anyone these days.

Yeah, that's advantage and disadvantage. at the same time, because then it's harder for the people who educate in that field to get job because people who doesn't have, who don't have the path, the right path, those for celebrity work.

So you mean like people like music teachers you're saying wouldn't have What are you, sorry.

I mean, I mean that you don't have to do the, the whole education path. So like the,

the, um, paying money for school loans and being poor while studying and not being able to work. So you're saying there's people that will somehow get to the same path, but they didn't go to get the actual diploma or certificate in.

Exactly. Yeah.

Well, it's interesting. Like people didn't, the guy who created Facebook, he didn't even go to college.

A lot of people don't go to college and apparently are so smart they can like create all these businesses, you know I mean you've heard of the meowing woman who is Creating videos online and all she does is walks around on the floors and just goes MEOW And apparently she makes 5, 000 a year, I mean a month and I'm like Dude, I went into the wrong profession.

I need to start meowing and walking on the floors. Maybe that's what we need for Patreon, you know? Try and create, like, a paid subscription. I'm just gonna, like, put my whiskers on, and I'm gonna meow the hell out of me. But I think people are watching that for a

different reason than you think. Meow. I am

a good kitty.

Yeah.

Practicing.

Yeah. Just practicing. Yeah. We might have a job opening. We might need a fellow cat that's younger and it's meowing. I mean, who knows? There's so many acting options here. I

think we have to prepare for that. Yeah. We need to study for another four years to pretend to

be a cat. That's awesome.

So we, so, so we're therapists here and we talk a lot about therapy, mental health, um, we talk about. Uh, the unknown, dreams, synchronicities, uh, things that people feel that lead them to do something, or, uh, coincidences that happen in people's lives. I don't know. I'm just throwing it out there. Maybe you have some kind of weird coincidences, or maybe you've seen a ghost.

It's just cool to hear different stories. Oh, yeah. You know. Also, I'm not a therapist, by the way. Yeah, you are. You're my therapist. That's enough.

Sorry, go ahead. No, I'm afraid I don't have any, any stories like that. Okay. No ghosts, no.

I would really like to

Tell something about that, or

just make

it up, and then

Or you, did you ever go to a fortune teller?

No. No? No,

never, actually.

Poland has so many good fortune tellers. Do they? Yeah, they, in my little city of Vaucz, uh, in the north, uh, West part of Poland. Uh, there was, I was always going, like when I was in high school, you know, you always have this question like, Oh, am I going to be dating someone? Is there going to be someone that's going to love me?

You know, so we would ask groups of girls go and, uh, get fortune teller readings. So, I was told I would live in a big city. And I guess Columbus is sort of a big city. And what else was I told? Uh, Oh, just, just little things like that, you know, but I don't even remember now. So well, was it important? Okay. So what do you love about Poland versus love about Norway?

Because you lived in both countries.

Yes. Um, what I love in Poland, I think there are many, um, there are much more perspectives and options for the, for the artistic world than I saw, but then I had to experience in Norway. Okay. That was the main reason why I wanted to move back. But well, Norway has beautiful nature, which Poland, Also has in some points, if you know how to search for it, um, but it's much harder, um, I dunno, I was thinking about people where, so I like people more in Poland versus in Norway, but I, I really don't know.

People are so, so different and both can be. Both cool and really unlikable in both countries.

I don't know. How do you? I think, uh, I think maybe Poland, like a lot of people are very like, I don't know if that's even true, but the culture seems very inviting. Like, especially if there's someone from a different country, they, Polish people seem to be very like, you know, welcoming, like welcoming.

Want to say hi, talk to you and curious and things like that. And then Norway or the German culture seem a little more like aloof or like cool, like they're not like as quick to like say hi and like ask you stuff. I don't know. I just always felt like that, but

they're much more closed. I think they're much more into their own house.

They like to spend their time. With their family or with their friends. They're not that, yeah, they're not that open, I think, but at the same time, I think they're much more helpful than Polish people are. So, I don't know, I wouldn't say, I, I think I would say even the opposite of Polish people than you said, that they're so open to That's my opinions, right?

It's like they say, uh, you know, an opinion is like an asshole, everyone has it, you know? And I also, the other thing I was going to say is like, I know Poland and you know Poland from the inside out. So like, we have a very, very, uh, intimate connection to the country and the people around us. So we know that people can't, people are assholes.

You know, but I've heard from immigrants that are coming, let's say from America, going to Poland, they are describing this country as like, Oh, everybody's so nice. Everybody smiles. Everybody's helpful. You know, so I think we as a country, as people come, you know, come across to other people as welcoming and open and inviting and helpful.

Not so much to people like me and you that live there and you need help then everybody's like, you know You need to have money you there's a lot of bribery going on like you need to have connections You know, you need to know somebody to get something done so that's why I moved away because I Like to have a feeling like if I want to make my own destiny, I'll make my own destiny I don't want to be stuck in a country where you feel like you have to like You I don't know, like kiss someone's ass, you know, for every day for years to get somewhere, you know, so did you ever regret moving?

No, never once looked back. I don't want to live there. I, um, it's, it's, it always felt like, even when I was in Poland, like even when I was a little girl, like seven years old, I was already studying English, like trying to learn from books because it wasn't in school. And then. Then as soon as I learned about the program where I could leave and be in America, like, I was all about that, like 120 percent in, focused, I did everything I had to do, you know, my family didn't have money, we had to, they had to get money from, like, different people for me to have a ticket and to go and never once looked back ever since I moved here.

I lived here. I went back a few times to visit. Now I moved my parents here. They live with me and my sister lives in Germany. So yeah, I never regretted my decision. In fact, I I don't even know what I would have done if I was still in Poland. I just, I love the country. I love the people, but I do not love the politics.

And I don't like what I see when I look at what kind of decisions are being made there and how, you know, I just don't even want to know. That's why I'm like staying away from politics. And sometimes my parents tell me what's going on there. And I'm like, I just don't want to know. I cry. I just can't do it.

You know,

I immigrated from the Bahamas. And yeah, when I hear about everything going on, I'm just like, oh, but also here there's stuff, there's stuff too. Everywhere you go, there's going to be some corrupt politics or whatever going on.

So that's why I think, you know, for everyone, it's like you, you have to, I, I think there's something within you for everyone.

There's something within you that's sort of like, You feel that you want to do this versus this. Like it's kind of like when you go and you have the vision exam at the doctor and they're like, what about one? What about two? Do you see better with this? Do you see better? And it's like, you have to do your own individual adjustments.

It's the same with your life. It's like you have a calling. You feel like there's something. Pulling you towards something then that's your calling. That's where you need to go, you know and if it doesn't feel like the right thing and It's like something's pushing you away from that direction. Then maybe that's not your way, but Life is not supposed to be difficult.

It's kind of supposed to be you're guided. You always have the internal gps kind of guiding you and You know, that's why I think for you, uh alicia. It was The acting, you, you felt like you loved it. The same with Sophie. I mean, you, you were singing since you were six or seven, a baby, as soon as I'll show you a video.

Yeah, you see what I mean? So it's like, there's, and I always like, so for me, I was always into, well, first I was into birds. I think I like big words. So ornithologist, ornithologist, right? Ornithologia, that's the science for birds. And I was always like, oh yeah, that's what I'm going to do. So when I was seven, I always said, I'm going to do that.

Then it was ecology. I was going to be an ecologist, you know. And then when my father got depressed, then it was like, oh, I'm going to be a psychologist. You know, it was always with the ist ending, the, you know, ecologist.

Yeah. But how do people view the States from Poland or in Poland? I think now it's, it's different

from when it was like 20 years ago.

How do you view it

now? Yeah, because I want to know too.

Well, I think it, it is kind of a big brother to us still, that things happen in America, but there is, the world is divided. From the Europe and the America and the Africa and then

it's, it's all,

so I think we, I don't think it's such a topic. I think we mostly live in the world where we live and we're not talking that much about America.

Most, it's different now with social media because we just know what is happening there. Because of the social media and mostly the celebrate celebrities and the actress and, and politics. And, and

the meowing cast. The meowing ladies and meow like cats. That's what you see about America. Yeah. .

Exactly. Yeah.

But now America, I think it's, I think it's most about Facebook, TikTok. Yeah. You know, social media in general. That's what we get from, from America. So it's not like the, the goods that America, you have this, you have this, you have, uh, so much food you have, it's not about the goods that we're spoiled. We're spoiled

here.

What do you think We're spoiled. One more time. We, we are spoiled here. That's what you're trying to say. We have so much food in America. I, I don't think so. I

think now we're not talking about the material things. in America. I think now we think it's quite equal or that we have the same chances and more, I don't know, we, I think we kind of treat it as, as a different world that we look up to, but not in every aspect.

I only ask because like, I always hear people looking at the states as either like super bad or super good. But at the end of the day, like, no one's actually, you know, the voices on social media seem so loud but realistically there are people like you are just living your life and no one's checking for the states, like, no one's worried about, you know, but I always hear either two extremes because I'm seeing social media stuff, you know.

Yeah, I think, I think it's not either good or bad, but it's big, and that's what we think about when we think America. So there's always something going on. Yeah, I think, I think this way is, is the most common, I think.

So I noticed on your Facebook that you were doing some volunteering in other countries.

Tell us a little more about that.

Yes, I was volunteering in Madagascar, um, last summer. I was there for about two months. Uh, just spending time with, with the kids and learning them English. Um, it was through, um, some, so.

That sounded like a

lot of stuff in your mouth that you just said, we'll just say through some institution. Okay.

Yes, through some institution. We just went there with my, with my friend. And yeah, we were there for two months, as I said, and I think it was both very difficult and very important to me. Okay.

In general, um, I think there are some events in life which everybody should experience. And this is one of those, I think, that's such a different life and such a different level of life or standard. Um, it gives lots of reflection. And I think I'm really bad at talking about this because I can't I, I think that I can't, uh, take the experience into the world, words.

I

think we get it. Yeah, exactly. What I just, you know, it sounded fabulous. And, and, you know, the, the pictures were awesome. I saw a lot of pictures of you with the kids and it seemed perfect. Pretty amazing. Um, were you able to use your social media or your phone? Or was it like, like far away from any towers for cell phones and you, you couldn't use anything you were writing letters to your family and with a pen and paper?

No, no, we could, we could use our phones. Uh, there was, uh, there were two places that we had the internet connection, so that was luxury actually. Um, And we were in quite, um, developed place. Um, we, for the first three weeks, we thought that we don't have the whole, uh, hot water, but it ended up that we just didn't turn it on.

Water for like a month, almost like sick for, for the first month, just to, cause Madagascar seems to be a worm, but it really isn't. There was like two degrees Celsius. Oh, wow. In the morning and in the evening. Do you

have Celsius in Bahamas? No, but we kind of learn both. Okay. But my family.

Yeah, because I still think in Celsius, but they use Fahrenheit here and for some reason I cannot relearn it.

It's like whatever you learn as a kid like stays with you. It's yeah, I can't unlearn this old dog. You can't teach you, whatever. Anywho, so you're saying you did not have to use pigeons to send letters to your family or anything. You could use cell

phones.

And you had hot water. That's

interesting how cold it was.

Yeah, so it's just like in the morning and night it got really cold and then during the day was it warmer?

Yes. When the sun will, uh, when the sun was shining, it was hot, but not otherwise. It was really weird to come in the morning because we were meeting with the kids in the morning because it was oratory.

So it was just the kids were coming. There was like a thousand of kids. And they just were coming in the, in the morning. And it was really weird because me and my friend were just wearing like three layers of clothing, just to get warm. And there were kids. That will run up to us in the morning, just wearing a t shirt and like the, their hands were like, so, so cold and you couldn't do anything cause you couldn't give it to them like right away.

Cause there were like thousands of these kids, yeah, it was difficult because

you're probably a very empathetic person, so it sounds like it was hard to see the poverty and the suffering of others. It was. Yeah. Yes, yes. And at the same time, I

was thinking that I'm not the one who needs help now. So it was kind of, it

reminds me a little bit, like when I went to Greece and Albania this last summer, just to visit for a few weeks.

And it was so hard to see like the homeless dogs and the cats and the, uh, the kids that, you know, You know, just seemed hungry or like not dressed appropriately for the weather or, you know, just, just kind of like knowing that you have food and you have whatever you need, and you throw away food and you throw away things because you're, you don't need it, you know, and you don't even finish it.

But then there's, there's other people that just don't have that, you know, it was, it was hard to see.

It was a place in Madagascar when they don't see much of a white people. So, and you're like the whitest out of the white out there. Look at you. Yeah. I mean, I was totally white and when the sun would shine.

Like people, the kids were really like, like pointing at you. Pointing at you Uhhuh. Like pointing at you? Pointing at me. Because they were, they were so shocked that I can be so wide. 'cause when the sun was shining, I was really, I was shining.

Was that the only, uh, time you went volunteering to, uh, other countries or did you travel some more around the world?

Uh, no volunteering from to the, on the country. Just, just once. I was volunteering, um, quite a lot in Poland, just locally. Um. Yeah, I was, I just like to do different things, which is a plus, but also minus because I touch a lot of things, but I don't finish many of them. So, uh, so I did a volunteering with, uh, with the, uh, uh, I didn't get prepared and I don't know how is it called in English, but people with people with difficulties.

Disabilities

like, uh, blindness,

deafness. Yeah, exactly.

Okay.

There's one thing with that. And that was also a very important experience. I think that is the second one that I think to see someone

that's disabled, like, you know, wheelchair or something like that. And to know that. We have like this whole body to use and we frequently don't appreciate it, right?

Like we stare in the mirror and we're like, Oh, look at this wrinkle. Oh, like, and then, you know, you hurt your back a little bit and you're like, Oh, I have pain. And then to see someone else completely not be able to use their legs or arms or, or be blind or something like that. Right. And they, they also have to live.

Yeah, even after that experience, you just forget about it really easily. Yeah. And you just get focused on your

problems again. Of course. I know, I am one of those people too. It's like I get so mad, you know, when things are not going the right way and I'm trying and trying and then I'm just going to spend probably about 30 minutes to 40 minutes venting about it to Sophie and that's when she says she's not a therapist.

I'm like, no, you are a therapist. All right, you got to listen to me. So, um,

Uh huh. And as a therapist. That's something that is really interesting. Both of you.

Well, she's, she's sort of a therapist, so she's sort of, because she's kind of like listening to me, so I'm jokingly saying. She's

joking. I studied, I have a degree in psychology, but that's not like what I do for work.

But you. I am a

therapist. Yeah. And then I'm a nurse practitioner, so I prescribe meds sometimes for people for mental health

reasons. She was asking how you became

Oh, how I became a therapist. Uh, well, my dad was, uh, diagnosed with kind of like a paranoid depression. when I was 14 and he, um, really, he didn't say it out loud to me, but he wanted to commit suicide.

He heard voices that were telling him to commit suicide. So he, he kind of told my mom about it. And then my mom called, uh, kind of the equivalent of the 9 1 1, right? Um, Yeah. in Poland and then they transported him, put him in the hospital for two months. So that's when I, I feel like I kind of had to grow up really fast.

Like, Oh, you know, my family's falling apart. My dad's not here to protect us, you know, and I had to kind of be like the man of the family, kind of, uh, grow a pair. And, uh, And then, you know, when my dad came out of the hospital, I just saw, you know, how he was, um, zombied out on the drugs and how he was not even a real person.

And then I said to myself, you know, this is something that I would like to learn more about. And I don't even know when that fought or that became my goal, but I just knew that I wanted to work in mental health. So when I moved to the States to be an Annie, I started going to school within a year of getting here.

And I always knew I, I, like, this was just a drive, such a strong drive, like, to know that I wanted to do this and then take classes and do everything I could, right, to study. And then I got married and I continued to go to school. So I got a psychology degree first, and then I realized that, With my English being a second language, it was a little difficult to pass specific tests like they have to get into college or university.

What are they called? The ones that test your English ability? Oh my gosh.

I know what it is. Because they almost

wanted to give it to me because they didn't know the Bahamas spoke English. It's not GMAT. It's um It's something else. They have a test you have to take. There's TOEFL. English learning proficiency or something.

That's different. This one is for, like, when you're coming here, it's the first test that you take to become a student. But there's another test for regular Americans that have, they have to take it. Um, and so I took that test and I was not, you know, I didn't do very well on it. Uh, I didn't do well enough to get into Ohio State University.

I did well enough to go into other universities around, around Ohio, but I didn't want to drive an hour, two hours somewhere else. So then I explored other disciplines and I said to myself, okay, like social work sounds like that's your therapist when you finish it. And that my score was better than that.

you know, high enough for me to get into social work at Ohio State. So I got in there and then I went to school for about, I think, two more years to get a master's. So I got a bachelor's in psychology and then a master's in social work. Then I worked for two years and I was poor and I didn't like that.

So I went back to get, you know, a nursing degree, a registered nurse degree. So it's a bachelor's and then it was, it was like a full one year program where you would like full time, they owned you. And then during that program, my ex husband decided that he didn't want to be married anymore. And I had a horrible time, uh, just, I was very depressed and just broken down because I, you know, didn't see that one coming.

Um, so, so then after we got divorced, I was just kind of working as an RN and then I was like, well, I want to stay busy because I don't want to think about how depressed I am. I don't want to be crying anymore. So I worked and I also signed up to go to school to get a master's in nursing. And then I also signed up for the army because, because you might as well just stay so busy that you're barely have time to think.

So, so I did all of those things and then that's how I became a nurse practitioner and I finished the army thing for six years. So I'm done with that. So yeah, just. And you have your own business. And yeah, of course. And then in the midst of it, you know, build the business and then continue trying to build something and never found a guy.

Okay. So if you know anybody in Poland that needs a wife, I am right here. I'm right here. I'm a therapist. I'm a wife. Whatever you need me to be. I'll do that. Yeah. And now I'm 44. So they need to be age appropriate. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Not under 16, right? No.

No. Yeah, I was even worried that Alicja was under 16 or under.

I was like, oh my god, I didn't ask her how old she is. She might need her parents permission.

That

was kind of funny.

I've heard that people say that, uh, that people go to psychology to solve their own problems. Absolutely. Okay,

absolutely. I feel like something leads you to do it. Like you want to understand yourself better.

Why not study psychology? Well,

I had a different spin on it. I was like, yeah, I'm already perfect. Perfect. But I might as well help other people become perfect. You know,

I'm just joking. But no, you're so humble. I don't see you doing.

But yeah, no, I think I went into it not really thinking about myself. I was thinking about my dad and I was thinking about how do I, how do I provide services to people that, so my, when my dad was receiving services in Poland, it was really hard.

First of all, there was no, not really any therapists that you could find, not really psychiatrists that were not so overbooked that you had to wait like a month to get into. Um, and then when my mom and my dad would go to these appointments, some of these psychiatrists would just scream at my dad or my mom.

Uh, there were times when my dad would, you know, like need emergency hospitalization and or need to be written out of work because he would just, you know, like completely be so depressed, like he would refuse to go to work. And, um, The psychiatrist would like literally scream at my mom and my dad for showing up at the office.

Oh, you didn't have an appointment, you know, or your insurance pays shit, you know, because it's government insurance, and so we don't want to see you. You need to sign up privately, right? And my mom's like, I mean, the stories, you know, I can keep going. But the point was, I sort of always wanted to help people receive services where they wouldn't feel judged or criticized or embarrassed about going to those or, um, You know, yeah, I think that's what it was.

Do you think that if the

situation with your dad didn't happen, would you choose the same path? Probably not, honestly, because I would never know what would happen, like, what people go through. And there's more. I mean, my, my family, My dad's siblings, my mom's parents, her siblings, because it was in Poland, this was, you know, some like 30, you know, 30 years ago, the mental health stigma was still so high that family members, like we were hiding that my dad went to a mental health hospital and when they found out that he was there, They made fun of us.

They blamed us for my dad being hospitalized. They literally, some of them would show up at our house and say like, this is your fault that your father didn't want to live. I was just going to say, Alicia, you're such a good listener. Look at you doing therapy on me already, you know?

I think it's much more open.

Definitely from what you are telling or saying, um, I know lots of people who has problems with with mental health. And finally, I think we can talk about it more

openly.

Also, in our society, I mean, the theater. people, there are lots of mental problems. And, uh, I think maybe half of our year has some anxiety or depression.

Yeah, or has some anxiety. So I think it's better now because you can get the appointment, you can get some help. People are talking about this and people are encouraging others to talk about this. And that. That it is a topic that it's not, um, it's, we don't, we don't play as it's, as it doesn't happen, as it's not

happening.

You don't pretend it doesn't exist. Yeah. No, absolutely. So it's good to hear. You know, it's really good to hear.

I think

it's

still

difficult

for, um, for the older people. I mean, and my parents, I think, but now it's changing, hopefully.

Wait a minute. You got to tell me how old your parents are. You're going to tell me they're my age.

Like I want to hear it now. My mom is 52 and Okay, she's older than me a little bit. Uh huh. 53. Okay. So they waited quite a while to have kids then. Um,

and I, I have four siblings and I'm Okay. Almost the youngest. So I think my mom got pregnant being 21, I think.

So, okay. So what about you? Are you, uh, how do you foresee your future?

How do you think of your future? Do you have some kind of like, you know, I want to have a husband, I want to have kids, or is it like completely open? You have no idea what you want to be doing or, or, or I don't

want to have

kids. Uh huh.

But I, I think it can change. But at this time, I don't see it coming.

And I don't know, I think I'm quite open about what will happen. I'm in such a point in my life that I think everything will be changing in like one, two years, next two years. So I think I'll just look how, how this one will go.

So you have the, you have someone like the love of your life or you're still kind of on the lookout?

I think

so. I think so. It's really interesting because I haven't been in a relationship ever in my life because I just didn't find anyone, uh, so interesting to get to know.

And

now I found someone. So I'm in a first relationship being 22, which is quite uncommon, but it's great now.

So you got to tell us about him a little bit, like, you know, and how you guys met.

That's just romantic stuff. I like to hear it. Yeah. All right,

we, we knew each other, we, we were working on the same, uh, camp kind of, uh, in the summer, and we were meeting year by year throughout like three years, uh, but we were just friends, like none of us, uh, with anything more. Uh, I liked him back then too, and I just worked out.

He liked me too, but he had a girlfriend, so nothing good. So we were just friends then. And, um, a year ago, I think he just texted me that we're. Um, we're meeting up the, with a group of friends that we were working there and if I wanted to come to, to see each other and he said that I can, like, he can, I think he is living in, um, in the north side of Poland and I'm living in the south.

South. Uh, so he, he just, uh, he said that I can come to him and then come to the, to the party. And it started like that. We just right away knew that now we have a green light to, to go for something else and

it worked. Nice. Okay. Very cool. Very cool.

Yeah.

How long have you been dating him? Bye. I'm, I'm such a detective and yeah, half

a year,

one and a half years.

Okay. So how did you guys celebrate Valentine's day? It wasn't that long ago. Yeah, I don't

like

such things. I don't celebrate

such things. But we were there on vacation, actually, because I had a free time in my school, and he got the free time from job. So we're in Thessaloniki, in Greece. Oh, that's nice.

What month? Oh, so February, you guys were there. Very cool. Very nice. Man, you like to travel a lot. What other countries have you been to?

Not that many, actually. I mean, the Scandinavia, so, so Norway, Sweden and Denmark, um, Germany, of course, uh, I don't know what else. Greece? Greece, yeah, Greece, Malta, um, Spain.

Spain. Thank you. Okay. Very cool. Very nice,

good job. I love that. I love that too, yeah. I thought we could, I would like to

travel

more. Mm-Hmm? . Oh, yeah. Where do you wanna go?

Thailand is something I would really go for now. Well,

I can, I can give you some information on how to volunteer in Thailand because my friend just volunteered there.

Great. Yeah. That's the pictures he sent me. Were kind of like your, your pictures of the volunteering. thousands of kids, just villages waiting for they, they volunteered with the medical core kind of like doing medical things. And it was like pictures were full of kids and villagers just waiting to get a service.

Yeah.

Do you know if you're out of the medical

field, can you

go there too?

I think so because they always need, you know, more people, but I'll ask. I have your email. information. I will be staying in touch. You know, the one thing that's really hard about uh, corresponding with you is that when I want to search your name, Alicja Matuszek in my inbox, like all of my stuff come up anyway, because that's my name too.

So that's the hard part. Yeah. Do you have a middle name? Do you have a middle name? No, I have a third name. I don't have a second, but I have the third name. It's Reta. Oh, interesting.

Yeah. Not Rety, but Reta.

Okay. Is it, you said the third name. So no middle name, no second name. Why do you say third name? Is it like the last name?

Uh,

no, it's like the first name I got from my parents and the second name you can get from, from the parents. Exactly. Exactly. Oh, okay. It's been confirmation.

Oh. Confirmation. Okay. Yeah.

I thought, um, we could end the episode with talking about the meaning of the name Alicia. I was looking it up and it means noble kind.

Woo, woo,

woo, woo, woo, woo. Yeah. Do you guys relate to that? Absolutely. Look at me. I'm noble all the way around. Ah. Ha, ha, ha. It's just the, uh, the age makes me less noble because the longer you live, the more you get disappointed and hurt by people, you have to develop a hard shell. So I have a hard shell around me.

Some people tell me that I have a bitch resting face, kind of like looks mean, you know, some people tell me I intimidate them because I'm very, uh, direct with people. Um, and then I also always, I'm on a mission, you know, I have to do so many things. I'm always like, Boom, boom, boom, like I go get do this done, ah, you know, so I think maybe some people get intimidated, but I always know like, Sophie's not intimidated, that's, that's all that matters.

What do people say about you? Yeah. Um,

I think they say that I'm very open and that I'm very, very kind, that I, uh, that I give a lot of energy out, not inside. I think that's the most. And that I'm honest too,

so. She sounds a little more noble than me. You're both very honest though, so that's some similarities there, yeah.

Maybe it's a Polish thing, right? Maybe it's just about, like, we are not taught to Um, how would I say that? Just, I, I think it might be some type of a culture thing where, where you're like, tend to be more honest when you speak, rather than try to cover things up, you're just kind of like, blah, you know, this is what it is.

Mm hmm. So, at the end of the episode, we do a naked truth. We sometimes do it and sometimes we don't. Um, so the naked truth episode is something that maybe, like, you have a really, like, a favorite quote that, Speaks to you or maybe some event that happened to you that brought you to where you are today Or maybe something that we spoke about or we talked about in this episode that you kind of like clicking with you Do you have anything Sophie because it's always nice to give an example So it's always kind of like, kind of like a deep truth about something, like something that's us naked as you can make it, you know, us direct

and Like, I guess my naked truth today from the conversation would be to stick with the arts.

Like it's okay if you know, for work you do something that like to make your work and your creative passion connect is like, that's really resonating with me from the conversation. Yeah. Yeah.

I like your naked truth. Thank you. I was thinking kind of along the same lines, like, just, you know, I see her, she's 22 years old.

She, we have the same name and I see her passion and I'm thinking like, go after what you want, you know, make it happen. You're the author of your life and you decide what's going to happen and if you don't go for it because you want to hide within yourself. Because you don't feel good enough, or something else is blocking you, then you're not gonna, you're not gonna live your full destiny.

So, go after what you want and see what happens. I mean, what's there to lose anyway, right? Yeah. Yeah. Well, and it's like, you know, Sophie's doing awesome. I mean, she, She's still hiding a little bit, but she has a website, she's recording music, you know, she's figuring things out. And I think that's what life is about.

It's just, you know, every day you wake up and you do a little more and then you do a little more and it's, it's just, it accumulates and eventually you have something to show for it. But if you hide and you don't feel like you deserve it, then you just never go after it. So I'm glad to hear you're going after it.

You're going. Yay. What's your naked truth? Oh, go ahead, sorry.

It kind of relates with yours, I think, a little bit. Because I think that everything is for something. That everything has a meaning. So, I mean, this, this little step. Also, talking to you, I think, had, had an involve, had an impact on me that I didn't think about before.

So, that was What kind of an

impact? Now we have to

know. No, different about the therapist thing, because I was totally thinking about this as a plan B, and I'm not giving up on this, I think. Yeah, about the arts thing, about talking in English, about giving out something.

And starting, uh, maybe a Twitter, not Twitter, TikTok or Instagram so that we can promote your, uh, your acting.

Well, I'm shocked, because it's a totally different person. Yes,

completely different. Normally, English is spoken differently and Polish is spoken

differently, right? Yes, and completely different. Well, it's a totally

different person. Yes, if we spoke Polish, there would probably be even more to say about these different experiences.

We're just, you know, we're just in shock how it's so different when we switch to Polish, how differently we, uh, see each other. And so like she has this perfect no accent Polish over there and she, she would probably tell us things, you know, the things that we talked about, she would describe it in so many more words.

So it's just cool to, uh, experience her Polish firsthand, you know, I love that. Aelitia, it was such a pleasure to talk to you today. Thank you so much for being so open and so kind with your time and just such a bright light over there going after the dreams that she has. So, so wonderful.

Thank you. It's really interesting experience and very crazy and I'm so excited and so thankful that we found the time to finally do this.

Yay! Let's not let this connection die out. Let's Stay in touch and I'm waiting for the talent thing, volunteer. Yeah, right. It's like, I don't want to hang up the phone. Right. Because it's like, I just want to keep talking to her because she's so awesome.

Finally, we're finally meeting. Well, thank you so much.

Thank you very much. Thank you. We'll talk to you soon. Ciao. Bye. Have a nice day. Bye. You too. Bye.